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Did you hear about the experienced
new employee?
A few weeks after a young man had
been employed; he was called into the Human Resources administrator's office. "What
is the meaning of this?" the personnel officer asked. "When you applied for this
job, you told us you had three years experience. Now I have discovered this is the
first position you've ever held."
"True," the young man answered with
a smile, "in your advertisement you said you wanted a person with imagination."
Unintentional yet funny
gaffs from real job application forms
1. "I procrastinate, especially
when the task is unpleasant."
2. "Personal interests: donating
blood. Fourteen gallons so far."
3. "As indicted, I have over five
years of analyzing investments."
4. "Instrumental in ruining entire
operation for a Midwest chainstore."
5. "Note: Please don't misconstrue
my 14 jobs as 'job-hopping'. I have never quit a job."
6. "Marital status: often. Children:
various."
7. "Reason for leaving last job:
They insisted that all employees get to work by 8:45 am every morning. I couldn't
work under those conditions."
8. "The company made me a scapegoat,
just like my three previous employers.
9. "Finished eighth in my class
of ten."
10. "References: none. I've left
a path of destruction behind me."
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